Do you have any 'limericks' in other languages?

[Le Baron]

Or humorous poetry? Here's an old classic:

There was a young lady from Hyde
Who ate some green apples then died.
The apples fermented,
Inside the lamented,
And made cider inside her inside.

And a few more old classics:

A wonderful bird is the pelican.
His bill will hold more than his belly can.
He can take in his beak,
Enough food for a week,
But I'm damned if I see how the hell he can!

A London policeman named Pete
Was found asleep on his beat.
The English bobbies,
Don't have any hobbies,
They just have arrest in the street.

There was a young lad in the choir,
whose voice seemed to get higher and higher,
It reached such a height,
It went clean out of sight,
And they found it impaled on the spire.

A pretty young maid from Berlin.
Was born so incredibly thin.
That when she essayed,
To drink lemonade,
She slipped through the straw and fell in.

[tractor]

The late sports commentator Jon Herwig Carlsen worked for the Norwegian Broadcasting Corporation (Norsk rikskringkasting, NRK) for over 40 years, and he used to read limericks during sports events, so most Norwegians are somewhat familiar with the genre.

[rdearman]

There once was a man from Nantucket...
No

In Dublin lived a lovely young lass ....
Errr. No.

Nope don't know any.

[Le Baron]

There once was a man from Nantucket...
No

In Dublin lived a lovely young lass ....
Errr. No.

Nope don't know any.

I was also limited. All the good ones are rather crude doggerel.

[Doitsujin]

I only found this German website with mostly godawful limericks: Sammlung deutschsprachiger Limericks

This might be a German thing as this classic US Becks ad shows.

Or humorous poetry?

How about Fisches Nachtgesang (=a fish's night song) by Christian Morgenstern, which doesn't require any translation:



All other Morgenstern poems, e.g. Der Werwolf, require translations:

Code: Select all

Der Werwolf               The Werewolf  (Gary Bachlund translation)   
      
Ein Werwolf eines Nachts entwich            One night a Were-wolf slipped away
von Weib und Kind und sich begab            From his Were-wife and his Were-wolf child,
an eines Dorfschullehrers Grab               To the grave of a rotten schoolmaster
und bat ihn: Bitte, beuge mich!               To decline himself as noun-beguiled.
      
Der Dorfschulmeister stieg hinauf         Ghost-like gray the schoolmaster rose
auf seines Blechschilds Messingknauf         From out of the gravestone’s head,
und sprach zum Wolf, der seine Pfoten      And spoke to the Wolf, crossed paws suppose
geduldig kreuzte vor dem Toten:         To beseech a philologist long dead:
      
»Der Werwolf« – sprach der gute Mann,      “The Were-wolf,” spoke the spirited man,
»des Weswolfs«, Genitiv sodann,               “Of the Were-wolf, in the genitive penned,
»dem Wemwolf«, Dativ, wie man’s nennt,   To the Were-wolf, is the dative scan,
»den Wenwolf«, – »damit hat’s ein End«.      And objective, a Were-wolf; that’s the end.”
      
Dem Werwolf schmeichelten die Fälle,         Such cases flattered the wolf called Were,
er rollte seine Augenbälle.                        Its Were-wolf eyeballs rolling widely wide.
Indessen, bat er, füge doch                     “However tense, all remains a blur;
zur Einzahl auch die Mehrzahl noch!         What’s singular? What’s plural?” he cried.
      
Der Dorfschulmeister aber mußte               Alas the corrupted schoolmaster confessed
gestehn, daß er von ihr nichts wußte.         “Incorruptible are most grammatical rules.
Zwar Wölfe gäb’s in großer Schar,            While wolves is plural, as you’ve guessed,
doch »Wer« gäb’s nur im Singular.            Wolf is singular, in most of our grammar schools.”
      
Der Wolf erhob sich tränenblind --               With this, the Were-wolf howled and cried,
er hatte ja doch Weib und Kind!!               “I am not singular! I’ve a wife and child!”
Doch da er kein Gelehrter eben,               And so the Were-wolf rushed home to bride
so schied er dankend und ergeben.            And Were-wolf child, tensely reconciled.
 

[Le Baron]

A poem actually concerned with language. I like it. It's rather complicated. I'm not sure it translates in English all that easily.

[ManuelH]

A nice one if you want to play with your German knowledge:

Der Mördermarder

Der Mardermörder hockt vorm Bau,
der Marder ist vor Angst ganz blau.
Er weiß, daß ihm vor seinem Tod
die Qual der Mardermarter droht,
wenn er nicht kurzentschlossen handelt,
sich kühn zum Martermarder wandelt
und marternd dem entgegenspringt,
der mordend in sein Reich eindringt.
Gedacht, getan, er hüpft ans Licht,
der Mardermörder sieht das nicht,
da der sich, scheinbar unbemerkt,
grad für die Mardermarter stärkt.
Der Martermarder zählt bis vier,
der Mardermörder trinkt ein Bier.
Der Mardermörder beißt ins Brot,
der Mördermarder beißt ihn tot.
--- Robert Gernhardt