trui wrote: My method when it comes to grammar and vocab has always been to learn a piece of grammar/vocab, try out a sentence or two that uses it, and then get feedback from native speakers.
Thanks for that very detailed explanation! So far, this is more or less what I've started doing with Italian. For the longest time I had an impossible time using reflexive verb constructions correctly even though I could understand them whenever I heard or read them. So, I decided to take one specific example (to brush one's teeth= lavarsi i denti) and I made a list of as many different ways to say it as I could:
-I brush my teeth.
-I brushed my teeth already.
-Did you brush your teeth?
-I don't want to brush my teeth.
-I don't like to brush my teeth.
-I was brushing my teeth when the phone rang.
I made up about 20 or 30 of these, asked a native speaker to help me translate them and then I looked for patterns to understand what the construction is supposed to be. Then every day for a few weeks I practiced asking and answering teeth-brushing questions with a native speaker (which was boring as heck and probably sounded really silly) but after about 2 weeks, I was able to say pretty much any variation that involved brushing teeth. Now, when I need to use a reflexive construction, I automatically think about how I'd say a similar thing but with teeth brushing and then adjust the verb to what I actually want to say.
It sounds like I'm doing something similar to what you're doing (though I focused only on one specific verb until i could master it). That was a good suggestion about asking if something sounds natural vs. asking if it's "right"; I will definitely remember to do that in the future. So it seems like tackling one grammar concept at a time and doing a lot of practice sentences is the way to go.
When I first tried to learn Polish about 10 years ago, I started with a grammar approach first and it was a huge failure for me. That's why I didn't even want to look at grammar until I felt more comfortable with either language, and so far I feel good about that choice. With Polish, I'm starting now to focus on the case endings, but not in the traditional way (memorizing declension tables). Instead, when I start to notice some endings that seem like they might be a pattern, I start writing down the complete sentence. Then I group the sentences based on similar endings and try to figure out what the pattern actually is.
I've found that if I have to figure out what the rule is myself, it makes more sense and I automatically internalize it, but if I read that same rule in a textbook or someone tells me what it is, then it seems really confusing and impossible to use.
Additonally, I decided to finally tackle how to make a singular word plural (after 600 hours of exposure to the language) because it felt like a Wild West No-Rules At All Show when it came to plurals. So I started with one little piece at a time. In the past, I would have tried to memorize the rules for making every single word into a plural, then gotten completely frustrated and quit. This time, I chose just one group of words (neutral nouns) and once I understood how to make them plural, I focused on the next group of words. Doing it like that has made a huge difference for me.
After coming up with these ways to deal grammar, it occurred to me that other people here must have devised their own strategies for handling difficult grammar concepts, so if anyone does have some tricks up their sleeves, I'm all ears!