cjareck wrote:English
I wrote a summary of an article which I have written with my wife. I would be grateful for checking it. It is about one interesting military periodical from the interwar period
“Kriegskunst in Wort und Bild” - a legal periodical for the training of illegal reserves
(Summary)
The monthly magazine "Kriegskunst in Wort und Bild" came into being in October 1924 as a help in improving the (delete "the") military knowledge and in propagating the (delete "the") patriotism. Military authorities were following its development and were influencing its content because recipients of the magazine were treated as a potential source of reserves in case of a war. To win the readers, the periodical had from the beginning a (add "a") rich graphical design. Its content concentrated mainly on patriotic (including anti-Polish) topics and training materials with basics of contemporary military knowledge. After introducing a compulsory military service in March 1935, the periodical changed its role - it was destined for lower grade commanders of the Wehrmacht. During the whole analysed period the responsible editor of the magazine was major Bodo Zimmermann. The periodical was published regularly and with a fixed size of 48 pages, so in the described period 126 issues have been published (6048 pages).
Keywords: „Kriegskunst in Wort und Bild”, German military press, Reichsheer, Reichswehr, illegal reserves
^^^ In English, names of languages and countries are always capitalized.
^^^There are a few minor article corrections.
Overall, this is well written. There are a few small changes to make. I tried to bold/color code anything that could use some editing. Below are some suggestions:
1) The monthly magazine "Kriegskunst in Wort und Bild"
came into being in October 1924
as a way to improve military knowledge and propagate patriotism.
"came into being" isn't wrong, but I think it would sound better to say something like "was created" in this situation.
2) After introducing a compulsory military service in March 1935,
the periodical changed its role >>> Saying it this way makes it sound like the periodical intentionally and actively decided to change its role, which I don't think is what you're saying. I think your intent is to say that the role of the periodical changed, but not because the periodical, itself, decided to change the role. If I'm understanding your intent, then I'd say it like this: After introducing a compulsory military service in March 1935,
the role of the periodical changed3) Just wanted to point out that if you are writing this article for a British audience, then you spelled "analysed" correctly. If you are writing for an American audience, American English spells this word with a z: "analyzed".
4) Except for the verb tense, the rest of the sentence is not wrong, but it sounds slightly awkward: The periodical was published regularly and with a fixed size of 48 pages, so
in the described period 126 issues
have been published (6048 pages).
I would move around the order of the information a bit and write it like this:
The periodical was published regularly and with a fixed size of 48 pages; 126 issues
were published
in the aforementioned period.
*I would change "described period" to "aforementioned period" if you are referencing a specific period of time that you previously referred to (which is what I think you are saying).
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Hopefully my feedback wasn't too confusing! Let me know if you have any questions or want me to read over anything else.
). 