Re: Negative Experiences in Language Learning
Posted: Tue Jan 12, 2021 5:52 pm
Thanks to everyone that shared! I don't feel quite so bad now.
1. What is a negative learning experience you want to share? What language?
I studied Spanish in high school, and I had a good experience all three years. I started loosing interest when I continued it at the community college, and the instructor was so boring. She was a nice enough person, but her teaching style managed suck a lot of the interest I had. At this point I think I had a solid B1, or maybe even a beginning B2 in Spanish.
Things got worse when I expressed interest in learning other languages, and my toxic father put a lot of pressure to focus on Spanish, to the exclusion of others. "Spanish is the most useful in the U.S.", he would say. I really tried to gather interest and enthusiasm to follow his "advice", but aside from the usefulness, I had no real reason to continue it: I didn't love Latino culture, I wasn't into telenovelas, and I didn't love Spanish literature. Still, I felt a lot of shame (and still do) for not having the desire to continue it, especially since my dad wanted me to continue. Said parent also actively discouraged my interest in other languages, particularly Japanese. He would ridicule me and condemn me for "loving the culture more than the people".
My last-ditch effort was learning customer service Spanish for a retail job--I even gave the overhead announcements in English and Spanish. I would talk to native Spanish-speakers in their language, and a few men asked me about my marital status.
2. How did you process the experience?
Like I mentioned, I felt like an inferior, or wicked person for not wanting to continue Spanish. I had gotten so far: why stop now? I really wanted my dad's approval as well--he was so hard to please. But I couldn't muster the interest, and I felt guilty for not loving it. Hence the thread I posted: Learning a Language You Don't Love The Spanish speakers asking me out...Makes me feel uncomfortable. When I first started learning Spanish, I loved connecting with people that I couldn't otherwise communicate with. Now I turned into an adult woman, and my efforts to communicate were rewarded with attention I didn't want. I feel bad for feeling repulsed, but...I feel repulsed.
3. What was the outcome? Were you able to continue on your TL, or did you choose to move on?
For years I have trying to either get the interest to continue the language, or being able to move on. To date, I have not seriously studied the language again. Aside from a couple of phrases, I can't speak it anymore.
Recently I have undergone a lot of mental and emotional healing, and I wonder if my feelings are legitimate, and that it's okay if I don't love Spanish. I can't find a reason to use it, and I don't need it. I also have not spoken to my toxic parent in two years, so I'm slowly removing his influence from my mentality. I think learning it in high school was a great experience, so I don't regret the time I studied it, but I'm accepting the idea that maybe it's okay to move on. After all, there are other languages to study, like Japanese.
1. What is a negative learning experience you want to share? What language?
I studied Spanish in high school, and I had a good experience all three years. I started loosing interest when I continued it at the community college, and the instructor was so boring. She was a nice enough person, but her teaching style managed suck a lot of the interest I had. At this point I think I had a solid B1, or maybe even a beginning B2 in Spanish.
Things got worse when I expressed interest in learning other languages, and my toxic father put a lot of pressure to focus on Spanish, to the exclusion of others. "Spanish is the most useful in the U.S.", he would say. I really tried to gather interest and enthusiasm to follow his "advice", but aside from the usefulness, I had no real reason to continue it: I didn't love Latino culture, I wasn't into telenovelas, and I didn't love Spanish literature. Still, I felt a lot of shame (and still do) for not having the desire to continue it, especially since my dad wanted me to continue. Said parent also actively discouraged my interest in other languages, particularly Japanese. He would ridicule me and condemn me for "loving the culture more than the people".
My last-ditch effort was learning customer service Spanish for a retail job--I even gave the overhead announcements in English and Spanish. I would talk to native Spanish-speakers in their language, and a few men asked me about my marital status.
2. How did you process the experience?
Like I mentioned, I felt like an inferior, or wicked person for not wanting to continue Spanish. I had gotten so far: why stop now? I really wanted my dad's approval as well--he was so hard to please. But I couldn't muster the interest, and I felt guilty for not loving it. Hence the thread I posted: Learning a Language You Don't Love The Spanish speakers asking me out...Makes me feel uncomfortable. When I first started learning Spanish, I loved connecting with people that I couldn't otherwise communicate with. Now I turned into an adult woman, and my efforts to communicate were rewarded with attention I didn't want. I feel bad for feeling repulsed, but...I feel repulsed.
3. What was the outcome? Were you able to continue on your TL, or did you choose to move on?
For years I have trying to either get the interest to continue the language, or being able to move on. To date, I have not seriously studied the language again. Aside from a couple of phrases, I can't speak it anymore.
Recently I have undergone a lot of mental and emotional healing, and I wonder if my feelings are legitimate, and that it's okay if I don't love Spanish. I can't find a reason to use it, and I don't need it. I also have not spoken to my toxic parent in two years, so I'm slowly removing his influence from my mentality. I think learning it in high school was a great experience, so I don't regret the time I studied it, but I'm accepting the idea that maybe it's okay to move on. After all, there are other languages to study, like Japanese.