Bilingual / Multilingual Jokes and Puns Thread

[kulaputra]

English/Hindi:

Q: What do you call a lonely banana?
A: A kela

(Akhela means "alone/lonely" in Hindi, "kela" means banana, "a" is the English indefinite article)

English/German:

Q: According to Sigmund Freud, what comes between fear and sex?
A: Fünf.

English/Spanish:

A Spanish speaker who knows no English goes into a clothes store in an English-speaking country and wants a garment but doesn't know how to ask for it. The manager shows the Spanish speaker different articles of clothing, shirts, jeans, sweaters, etc. but every time the Spanish speaker just shakes his head and says "no no."

Finally she shows the Spanish speaker a pair of socks, and the Spanish speaker says: "¡Eso sí que es!"

The manager responds: "If you could spell it all along, why didn't you say so?"

[Glossy]

Deleted.

[白田龍]

Que le dijo un jaguar al otro jaguar??? .......... Jaguariu

[kulaputra]

Que le dijo un jaguar al otro jaguar??? .......... Jaguariu

Jaguar: "How are you?"
Zorro: "No, I'm sorry."

[devilyoudont]

Q: "Orange" is English, "budou" is Japanese, then, what language is "apple?"
A: Apple.


Q: オレンジは英語、ぶどうは日本語、ではアップルは何語でしょうか？
A: リンゴ

[lowsocks]

These may not fit exactly into this thread, but:

1) Thomas Hood once observed of the French, that "they call their mothers mares, and all their daughters fillies."

2) In the preface to the old Teach Yourself German, by Sir John Adams, Sydney Wells, and E.S. Jenkins, they mention a student, who translated "J'aime la langue française" as “I love the tall French girl."

[Xenops]

Q: What do you call four Spanish speakers in quicksand?
A. Cuatro cinco.

[kulaputra]

For me, the Mexican holiday on the 5th of May is truly a day to celebrate.

Few people have come to know the “true” story of the origin of this wonderful holiday. It is my pleasure to set the record straight.

A little known fact is that back in 1912, Hellmann’s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York.

The ship hit an iceberg and sank and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day.

The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5 and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.

Go out on this day, grab a couple of slices of Wonderbread and a jar of Hellman’s mayonnaise and have a party. You know I will!